A heavy season can pull energy down fast, especially when loss changes the rhythm of a home. Many of us try holding everything together while the world keeps moving, and it can feel impossible to rebuild any sense of calm. This conversation opens a path toward structure, healing, and small wins that help life feel steady again.

Troy McDaniel shares how losing his grandmother pushed him to step into the work she always believed he could do. His story moves from a prison dog-training program to a career built around dog psychology, leadership, and guiding grieving families into a new chapter.

Press play for a grounded, human look at how purpose grows from pain and how our pets often become the bridge that gets us moving again.

Key topics:

• How structure supports healing after loss
• Why pets often help us rebuild routine, energy, and direction
• The difference between dog training and dog behavior coaching
• Managing expectations when adding a new dog to the family
• How grief influences the way we relate to our pets
• Practical stories from real clients navigating loss
• Troy’s journey from incarceration to dog psychology expert
• How dogs help us lead, reconnect, and take the next step
• Virtual coaching and what it can solve
• Troy’s books and daily philosophy on living with purpose

02:29 Meet Troy: Dog Behavior Coach 

05:18 Rebuilding After Loss of Grandma

09:28 Challenges and Realistic Expectations in Dog Ownership 

14:10 Dog Psychology 

19:03 How to Improve Your Relationship with Your Dog

24:14 Grow Through the Unexpected  

Books

📖Grid: Once in a Lifetime You Get to Start Over by Dr. Kimberly Hubenette

📖Live, Love, Survive, Thrive! by Dr. Kimberly Hubenette (COMING SOON)

 

Thank you for listening.

To keep my podcast alive,

Wanna buy my dog Dakota a bone?

• https://buymeacoffee.com/livelovesurvivethrive

Discount

Troy is giving 20 % off digital products on his website: www.packrunit.net

Use code:  behavior- 6yr3uwg8

Get Troy’s Books

• The Bad Dogs: Experience is the Best Mentor  
• Top 25 Big Dog Problems: A Practical Guide To Solving Dog Problems 

03:56 “There’s a lot going on in just everyday life. So if we have an animal that is mismanaged, it can create more confusion and more stress than possible, than what you need.” —Troy McDaniel 

07:54 “A lot of times, when people are sad or depressed and they need something or somebody to talk to, sometimes, a pet really does open your life up to move forward.” —Kimberly Hubenette

09:52 “We’re all different. We’re all unique in our own ways. And it’s the same thing with dogs.” —Troy McDaniel 

11:40 “Having a dog gave me purpose, to get up out of bed, to move forward, to do something.” —Kimberly Hubenette

13:54 “A dog is going to absorb the energy that you’re putting out, and if you’re putting out depressed energy, the dog is just going to follow suit.” —Troy McDaniel  

18:00 “Live, to me, is to continue to be inspired, continue to learn, continue to dream, continue to get to the bottom of a lot of the things that you know you’re curious about. Love is to be passionate about whatever it is that you find, and to continue to do it with all your heart. Survive is continuously pressing forward. Thrive is just to rinse and repeat.” —Troy McDaniel 

24:30 “We don’t know our abilities until we get to a position in life in which life forces us to get into the position we’re supposed to be in.” —Troy McDaniel

Troy McDaniel’s life changed while serving time, thanks to the Pawsitive Change Program — a unique initiative that trains shelter dogs alongside incarcerated individuals. Over three months, Troy worked with dogs facing anxiety, aggression, and abandonment, learning responsibility, patience, and emotional awareness.

“The dogs all had their own struggles, but they rehabilitated me more than I rehabilitated them,” Troy says. Each dog helped him see the world — and himself — differently.

After his release, Troy turned his experience into a career as a dog behavior coach with Training with Troy, helping families and individuals build calm, confident relationships with their dogs.

Troy’s journey is proof that transformation comes through connection, discipline, and understanding — for both humans and dogs.

Connect with Troy McDaniels:

• Website
• Instagram
• Facebook

Kimberly Hubenette: Welcome to the  Live, Love, Survive, Thrive! Podcast that helps you embrace life’s challenges, grow through adversity, and discover your true potential. I’m your host, Dr. Kimberly Hubenette, anti-aging dentist, widow, Author and inspirational Coach. I live by the “Can I” philosophy of constant and never ending improvement, and I’m here to help you do the same. Each week, we’ll dive into real conversations, powerful stories and practical tools to help you heal, grow and thrive. Whether you’re rebuilding after loss or ready to step into a more purposeful life, this space is for you. Let’s grow, evolve and thrive together. 

Hi, everybody. I am Dr. Kimberly Hubenette of Live, Love, Survive, Thrive!, a podcast about living life to the fullest, and checking things off of your bucket list after your loved one has passed away. And here today, I have a special guest, a friend of mine and a great person that I’ve known for over, I want to say that with the past 5 years, I’ve known this person. He is a very good dog trainer. His name is Troy McDaniel, he is a dog behavior coach and self published author. I want to welcome you, Troy.

Troy McDaniel: Thanks for having me. I’m doing well.

Kimberly Hubenette: I’ve known you for a long time. You have trained my dog, Dakota, and you’ve been a really good asset to our little family. Here, you want to tell us a little bit about yourself and what you do.

Troy McDaniel: Yes. So as Kimberly mentioned, I’m a dog trainer, Dog Behavior Coach. And basically, we help people to build better systems within their home. So a lot of people have dogs, and they don’t really have a structure, they don’t really have things to do with the dog. So we would just come and give you the tools that you guys need so that you can have a nice, calm household.

Kimberly Hubenette: Yeah, definitely. And how long have you been doing this? 

Troy McDaniel: I’ve been doing this for over five years.

Kimberly Hubenette: And what’s unique about your training? Because you call yourself a dog behavior coach instead of just a dog trainer, is there a difference between calling yourself a dog behavior coach and a trainer?

Troy McDaniel: Yeah. So the difference comes down to the results. So a dog trainer, traditionally, they’ll come and actually train your dog. But the problem on what we were noticing was that even though the trainer leaves, the dog isn’t responding to the actual dog owners, the people that called the trainer. And so my approach is more personalized. It’s more hands on. We get to the root of what it is that you guys are experiencing so that people can have a more harmonious and calm household, because we know working people have kids. There’s a lot going on in just everyday life. So if we have an animal that is mismanaged, it can create more confusion and more stress than possible than what you need. And so we come and de escalate that stress, and we help you guys to deal with the dog in more efficient ways. Not just telling the dog a command and expecting the dog to disobey, but knowing the tools, and knowing what to do to actually help the dog understand what it is that you guys want.

Kimberly Hubenette: Yeah. How does it correlate to my podcast Live, Love, Survive, Thrive!. When I met you, I had lost my husband of 20 years, and I had necessity of, I had a depressed dog, and I wanted to open my family to another dog so that my other dog wouldn’t be so depressed. And then I also had the challenge of having my new dog learn how to react with my new family as a new family member. I know you lost your grandma also, how did that affect your life, your dreams and aspirations with your journey?

Troy McDaniel: Losing my grandma, it kind of just pulled the band aid off to do the things that she felt were important. And I think I told you a little bit off camera, my grandma was a military woman. She’s been through the Navy and that stuff. So her main discipline was structure. And so after I lost her, I didn’t have that person to remind me of the structure and the responsibility that is needed. And so basically, with me losing her, it kind of put me in the driver’s seat to honor her loss by giving myself a better opportunity, and instill the tools that she instilled into me to be a responsible person, to be trustworthy, to let my word be my word, and not back away from it. To anybody that did lose somebody that is trying to figure out what to do next, one of the first things that I would tell someone is, what was it that they were really passionate about? What was it that you guys really talked about? And once you get to that area, then you can move forward and move on. And you can start building. 

Kimberly Hubenette: And you told me that you had pain, and it turned into your purpose. And there were ways that now you serve others because of your journey. Can you tell me a little bit about that?

Troy McDaniel: A lot of my clients go through the loss of not just people, but other animals. Like you mentioned, you know Rosco. I remember Rosco, and what we do is we try to help make the confusing, not really clear purpose of why they got the dog, and we try to make it clear and balanced. Because a lot of the clients that come to me, they are dealing with the loss, and they are trying to fill that void with another dog. And some people may look at it as being selfish. But when I work with these people and I see that they’re determined, they’re giving the effort, they’re not so easily to throw in the towel, that shows me that that’s a person who’s willing to grow and learn with losing another dog or losing another individual. And so part of what I do is I help people to build an expectation that gives them the space and the room to move forward.

Kimberly Hubenette: Yeah. And a lot of times, when people are sad or depressed and they need something or somebody to talk to, sometimes, a pet really does open your life up to move forward.

Troy McDaniel: It just gives you a new sense of purpose. Some people are so dependent on another individual or a certain animal, and so they’ll feed their attention into that one particular person or animal. And so when you grow dependent and just comfortable with focusing on that person or that dog, it becomes difficult and uncomfortable to move through life without that person being there, or that dog being there. So part of my biggest purpose and mission is to help people to move on, and to be stronger than before.

Kimberly Hubenette: Yeah. How many clients would you say need this kind of thing? How many people are dependent on their dogs?

Troy McDaniel: I would say about 60% of my clients come to me because they’re dealing with a loss, either of a human or a loss from a dog that they previously had, which is no longer in the picture.

Kimberly Hubenette: Is it hard for them to like, do they project their life on their dog? Let’s say you have some people buy the same or get the same kind of dog, same kind of dog, thinking that it’s going to be the same dog’s personality. Is that true? Or is it not true that all those same kinds of dogs have the same kind of personality?

Troy McDaniel: Funny you say that. That’s almost like saying people that come from a certain region, they all have the same personality, they all act the same. But we’re all different. We’re all unique in our own ways. And it’s the same thing with dogs. Some people, they get a Rottweiler. And this is so common. I have people that will get a Rottweiler and they’ll compare it to, oh, well, I had a Rottweiler when I was five. And so now that you’re 35 and it’s like, whoa, wait a minute. We don’t deal with dogs the same way that we used to 20 years ago. We don’t do that any more. You can’t leave dogs outside. You can’t do certain things. And so that’s where I kind of come and help them to build realistic expectations. 

Some people get dogs with already an idea. And then when they get the dog, if the expectation doesn’t meet what their idea was, then they’re ready to get rid of the dog, and so that’s where we come in to help people to build realistic expectations and just a framework on this is how it’s going to be. As you guys are moving, going out throughout life, you guys are going to get up in the morning, you guys are going to do this, you guys are going to do that, and this is what helps the person that lost somebody become more independent. Become more of a leader because this dog is expecting me to get up, take them out, do this, do that, so you don’t have time to really meditate on the loss of the individual.

Kimberly Hubenette: Yeah. It forced me, I know, to get up and go for a walk. It forced me to get up and take my dog outside, or those kinds of things. And if I didn’t do that, and maybe I’d be laying in bed all day long sulking or something sad. I’m not trying to say that having a dog is going to be everything. But it also gave me purpose to get up out of bed, to move forward, to do something. It also helped me stay energy focused, and at least exercise a little bit.

Troy McDaniel: Because like you said, you could not have a dog, and you could be laying in bed, and you can turn to the side to where you know your husband used to be. And that split second, now you’re going down memory lane. And now, all of this anxiety now is closing you in, and you don’t have an outlet. You don’t have a dog that can come in the room that can, oh, okay, let me take her out. Let’s go to the park. Let’s do this. So dogs do help people in a big way to get over the loss of individuals. You’re absolutely right.

Kimberly Hubenette: Yeah. It helped me, for sure. And the fact that it helped Rosco, my dog, to learn how to be a little bit less depressed that his master died, because I wasn’t his master. My husband was Rosco’s leader. Then I got Dakota. And now Dakota and he were together, and I had hoped that they would form a bond, and he would be less depressed too. And so does that really happen? Do we expect that that would happen in a dog, that they would feel responsible also for another dog?

Troy McDaniel: In some cases? Yeah. Because what I help a lot of my clients to understand is that some dogs, they cling to depression, they cling to sadness, they cling to the real low energy. And then you have other dogs, very high, what are we doing today? What are we doing next? Those dogs, they don’t know what to do with it. And so what I always try to help clients to depict is if you’re dealing with a dog that is very straightforward, or if you’re dealing with a dog that’s going to absorb the energy that you’re putting out, and if you’re putting out depressed energy not really motivated, not active, then the dog is just gonna follow suit. And so this is why I’ll come and kind of help put the client in a different mind frame and let them know like, hey, this dog is depending on you. This dog can’t get up and just move. The dog is dependent on you. This is what usually helps people get out of that funk. And to start, baby steps, baby steps. It doesn’t have to be drastic. It could be, I’m gonna take the dog for a walk this morning, and I’m gonna just see how it goes.

Kimberly Hubenette: You have a talent. I know when that happened to me, I was depressed and I had my dog, and then added Dakota to the mix, you have a talent. I know that you can read dogs really well. And do you think that it was because of your journey in life? How did you get into dog psychology? Tell the audience a little bit about your journey. How do you know how to read dogs so well?

Troy McDaniel: I was a part of a program they did for incarcerated inmates called the positive change program. And so there, it was a pilot program to teach inmates how to read and train dogs using dog psychology. And I took those tools once I was released from the program, and I actually started to use it. And where I started was a daycare. I started at a daycare, and I started noticing a lot of the dogs behavior issues because I’m in the group and I can read it. A lot of the other handlers, they don’t understand. They just know, hey, if the dog is doing this, put a leash on them, and put them in the crate. I’m trying to explain to them like, no, the dog is doing this because of this. No, you guys keep doing this. So after a while working at the daycares, it started to become more stressful knowing all the stuff that I know. Then it was easier seeing that, hey, he knows about dogs, so this should be a walk in the park, and I eventually started my own business. And from there, I started to work with a lot of dogs, and started to meet a lot of different clients, a lot of different cultures. And so it kind of helped me to pinpoint my purpose, and to see where the mix was. And so that’s where I started to actually take my talents and started helping people. I found you. I helped you with Dakota. And then from there, it just took off. It was just a wildfire.

Kimberly Hubenette: Your heart is so special, and your personality is so special that you have been part of our little family for all this time. And you’ve helped Dakota. Like, gosh. First, it was like two weeks with you, and then we went to every week or something, and then we went to every other week. And then now, we’re at once a month. I’m never gonna not depend on you for some uptake or upbringing, training and so forth because you are a special, intuitive trainer. So the one question that I want to ask you is, what does live, love, survive and thrive mean to you? You can pick one of the four things, or you can give us a little bit of information about each one of those. Live, love, survive and thrive, how does that keep you pressing forward with life?

Troy McDaniel: I’m gonna do it for all of them. So LIVE to me is to continue to be inspired, continue to learn, continue to dream, continue to get to the bottom of a lot of the things that you know you’re curious about. LOVE is to be passionate about whatever it is that you find, and to continue to do it with all your heart. So whatever that thing that you find to do, do it with love. SURVIVE is continuously pressing forward, continuously being inspired, and continuing to love what you’re doing. And to THRIVE is just to rinse and repeat.

Kimberly Hubenette: There you go. That’s great. Do you have a little story about any one of your particular clients that you’d like to share with the audience?

Troy McDaniel: I had a lot of clients that dealt with losing an individual, or even just dealing with a new dog that they’re trying to replace for the family. I had this one family whose son had a slight case of autism so they got a dog, and the dog didn’t like going in the car, which is common for a lot of pet owners. The dog doesn’t like riding in the car. So I came to help them to get the dog in the car and to be comfortable. And the funny thing is, how I did it was I just took the leash and I got it in the backseat of the car, and then the dog followed me in the backseat of the car. And then I told them, Art, just shut the door. And then they shut the door, and then me and the dog just sat in the car. And then I opened the door, then we got out, and then I told them, okay, I want everybody to do what I just did with the dog. And so everybody, one by one, they took the leash, and they got the dog in. 

And what I did was I took a situation that was associated with stress, and I turned it into a family filled activity in which everybody’s in sync. Because normally what the routine is that we have to get in the car, okay, you get the kids. Okay, I’m gonna go get the car ready. Everybody’s out of sync. So me, just doing that exercise with the family helped the dog to see that he was part of the family and make it easier for him to be comfortable in the car. So that was one session that it was fun for me to do. And it was also a good feeling to see that I could get them results right then and there, and explain to them why I was able to get those results. 

Kimberly Hubenette: So would there be one or two things that you would like to say to our listeners about what you do, and how we can get in touch with you if there was ever something that would be interested in following you, or anything like that?

Troy McDaniel: Sure. If you guys want more information on Dog Behavior Coaching or just resources, you guys can visit packrunit.net. That’s P-A-C-K-R-U-N-I-T.net, I’m also on Instagram, troytheboi_7. And you guys can find me at Facebook under Troy McDaniel.

Kimberly Hubenette: You are located in Northern California, can you do things for people in other countries, or other parts of the world, or parts of the state also? Or do you have to go to them?

Troy McDaniel: We do Zoom sessions, virtual sessions. With my experience and expertise, I can still help and guide you over a Zoom session. It’s kind of funny. The furthest I’ve ever helped a client through a Zoom session was England. The lady in England, she had a dog that was very hyperactive when guests came over, very bouncy, and bitey. And so I did a virtual session with her, and we were able to cure the issue that she was having. It was an underlying issue that I had to work with her. But eventually, the result was that the dog didn’t do that anymore.

Kimberly Hubenette: Wow, that’s so neat. All the way from London, huh? That is cool. 

Troy McDaniel: I didn’t even need a passport. 

Kimberly Hubenette: Now that we have the internet and we can stretch and talk to people from all over the world, it’s great to find ways to connect with people. And even with this podcast, I’m connecting with all these people that maybe I wouldn’t have connected with before. I hope that we have helped someone in this listening to the podcast today, or maybe you have lost a loved one and maybe you don’t know where to turn, maybe you could think about getting a pet or a dog, or maybe something like that, maybe we can help you with that. Maybe Troy could be a part of that process as well. Did you ever help people get a dog, a cat or anything?

Troy McDaniel: Probably not a cat, but definitely dogs. We help clients usher in a dog in an environment, especially when there’s kids, there’s other dogs, you might have elderly people, so we help people to make the best of efficient decision possible based upon their environment and their lifestyle.

Kimberly Hubenette: And do you have a quote that you go by or live by, and then give us anything on your website that you want to promote, or anything like that?

Troy McDaniel: Sure. I have a quote. I can’t tell you who it’s from, but he said, you’ll never believe what you can do when you have no choice but to do it. And basically, we don’t know our abilities until we get to a position in life in which life forces us to get into the position we’re supposed to be in. 

Kimberly Hubenette: And you said that you had your website so we can follow you. And you also wrote a book or two books, right? Tell us about that.

Troy McDaniel: I wrote 4 books. My latest book is The Top 25 Big Dog Problems. You guys can go look for that on Amazon. I have The Bad Dogs: Experience is The Best Mentor, and that book is my memoir of my time incarcerated, how I learned dog psychology with dogs, and what being incarcerated taught me.

Kimberly Hubenette: I am so happy that you said yes to come listen and talk to my listeners. I’m sure that you touched the life of one person. And if we could just touch the life of one or two people listening to this podcast, I’m sure that they would appreciate that you came and talked to them on this podcast.

Troy McDaniel: I appreciate it. Thank you. 

Kimberly Hubenette: Thank you so much for joining us. This is Dr. Kimberly Hubenette of Live, Love, Survive, Thrive!. And McDaniel, thank you.

Troy McDaniel: Thank you guys.

Kimberly Hubenette: Thank you for joining me on this episode of Live, Love, Survive, Thrive! I hope our time together has inspired you to embrace life’s challenges, find the courage to overcome obstacles, and create a life filled with love, purpose and fulfillment. If you’ve enjoyed today’s episode, please take a moment to rate, review and subscribe to the podcast. Your feedback means the world to me, and to help us continue to bring you stories and tools to empower your journey. And if you have a story of resilience, transformation or thriving after adversity, I’d love to hear from you. Reach out to me directly at livelovesurvivethrive@gmail.com. You never know, your story might just be the inspiration someone else needs to hear. 

To learn more about me and my work, visit my website at www.drkimberlyhubenette.com. While you’re there, be sure to check out my current book, GRID: Once In A Lifetime, You Get To Start Over, a guide to rebuilding and rediscovering life after loss. Get a sneak peek at my upcoming book, Live, Love, Survive, Thrive!, a powerful companion to this podcast, and a heartfelt roadmap to reclaiming joy, resilience and meaning after life’s toughest seasons. You can also connect with me on social media. Follow me on Facebook at authordr.kimberlyhubenette. Follow me on Instagram with the same name, and subscribe to my Youtube channel at Live, Love, Survive, Thrive! for more inspiration and insights. 

Remember, you have the power within you to write your story and thrive beyond your wildest imaginations. Keep relearning to live love, survive, thrive every single day. Until next time, I’m Dr. Kimberly Hubenette, and this is Live, Love, Survive, Thrive!